She was aesthetically pleasing, with a face that spoke a different language, the pores on her skin, were similar to maps I’d never travelled, and worlds I’d never seen, she had solar systems in her eyes, and stars engraved into her soul, she held a love so pure, so authentic, so irreplaceable.
If you were lucky enough to hold her, you wouldn’t be able to let go, you’d fall in love with the warmth, the passion of her mind, the spirit in her confidence, and the hospitality that came with the flash of her smile, her eyes would tell you stories, of places she’d never been, of things you couldn’t imagine, worlds that hadn’t been discovered,
She’d make them a reality from within her dreams
It was a runaway love, a mixture of longitudes and latitudes, with no compass to direct me, time was spent trawling through old photos, that left glittery dust on my boots, looking for clues and a reason, but none I could find, pushing against gravity, whilst being held in decline, inclined to give up, but too full to swallow my pride, lying fallow, too numb to stand up, too tired to sit down, I was the opposite of living, but even death wasn’t around, stagnated without you, deteriorating with every breath, I begged you to save me, you looked at me, drew a quick breath, debated for a second, turned around, walked away, and left
you could have your eyes wide shut, and still see my intentions, we don’t speak orally, but we have conversations, it’s a paradox of reality, an explosion of the senses, a parade of emotions, a prison with no fences, a simple moonlit night, with love or lust being the question, our hearts, our weapons, forever, eternally
I stopped searching so I could find, I tripped and stumbled, bumped into walls in the dark, blind, without you, the sun didn’t shine the same – dimmer than energy preserving bulbs, I wanted to walk the road, together, but together as one for me, meant alone, when I felt lost, I refused to look at a compass or a map, I’d follow the lit constellations, they would lead me directly to you, I was sure of that, my destination? infatuation, current population – one, I’m stuck travelling this universe, in search of you, my soulmate, I can almost taste you, I can almost feel you, the halcyon days end as I grow more desperate, seek me, ravish me, tell me you love me, need me, crave me, I’ll hand you the purest parts of me
And when I looked at you, the stars descended into the pupils of your eyes. It gave me the light I had hopelessly been seeking, in a time where the light at the end of the tunnel was a lie, fabricated.
How I had desired the tranquility, the peace, the influence you seemed to possess, and loathed your ability to only avail it when your authority was questioned.
I assimilated to your every human sense; your entire being. My body would synergise at the mere sight of you, confirming the enslavement of my heart. You were the drug I was warned about – but was mindless enough to consume anyway
I believe in hope and desire, I found it within you, I found art galleries within your mind, and wisdom yet to be discovered in your brain, you didn’t have to speak, the words flowed from your aura, shapes danced around you like you were an open fire
did you align the stars to match with me?
did you set the sun to match my moods?
did you breathe soft wind towards the back of my neck,
reminding me I exist?
I feel you near me, you’re the air I breathe
We got too hung up on details, like the curves within the clouds, the formation of the moon, the faces lining the crowds and the alignment of the stars, we got too held up by descriptions, like it could change our destiny, heal us and remove our scars, but the truth was in the kiss, the touch and the trust, simpatico in every respect, but too much of a good thing can ruin the spell of lust, the smell of flowers disappeared, the air felt unclean, you tasted different, the grass was no longer green, the sun backed away from us and left us with winter rain, the stars got dimmer and the evenings became tame, the enchantment became gloomy, the pressure was intense, I used to look at you like a queen, but then I saw sense, I spoke with the sky, surrounded myself in nature, I fixated myself with my brain so to myself I was no longer a stranger, I held my sense of purpose, I walked with a smile, I’m so proud to be who I am now that meeting you, was almost, almost worthwhile