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it’s been a long time since you extinguished the flames, then doused me in gasoline to set me back ablaze, you handed me the razor, the blade to cut away my outer shell, peeling layers of my dreams, senses and visions away, my heart started racing faster, pumping blood until my head started spinning, my lifeline was being erased, from a love that I had simply misplaced, you stripped me of the skin that used to caress me on the nights you left me, as if it could be replaced, the pain wasn’t important to you, you revelled in my misery, a public spectacle of emotion, on show for the world, almost like a special delivery, but now the emotions, I lack, the feelings I no longer feel, for the comfort of depression that I now reside in, is a true reminder of love, and with that, I know I’ll never feel it again 

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Let’s pretend

let’s pretend I’m your canvas, paint me with your harsh words, pretend I’m a public library, and read me like a book,

pretend you are afraid of me, live me out, and overcome your fear,

pick me like a flower, a thorn in the rose bush, butter me up like morning toast, let me satisfy your insides, sense me, touch me,

 journey with me in space and time, let’s touch the galaxy, let’s travel through different era’s, talk about the subjects we find meaningful, scary, deep, the darkest fears of our minds, 

every inch of the world has been photographed, except the stars within your eyes, put them aside for me, I’ll keep them safe, and never let them die

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She was aesthetically pleasing, with a face that spoke a different language, the pores on her skin, were similar to maps I’d never travelled, and worlds I’d never seen, she had solar systems in her eyes, and stars engraved into her soul, she held a love so pure, so authentic, so irreplaceable.

If  you were lucky enough to hold her, you wouldn’t be able to let go, you’d fall in love with the warmth, the passion of her mind, the spirit in her confidence, and the hospitality that came with the flash of her smile, her eyes would tell you stories, of places she’d never been, of things you couldn’t imagine, worlds that hadn’t been discovered,

 She’d make them a reality from within her dreams

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Runaway, love

It was a runaway love, a mixture of longitudes and latitudes, with no compass to direct me, time was spent trawling through old photos, that left glittery dust on my boots, looking for clues and a reason, but none I could find, pushing against gravity, whilst being held in decline, inclined to give up, but too full to swallow my pride, lying fallow, too numb to stand up, too tired to sit down, I was the opposite of living, but even death wasn’t around, stagnated without you, deteriorating with every breath, I begged you to save me, you looked at me, drew a quick breath, debated for a second, turned around, walked away, and left

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A common question; love, or lust?

you could have your eyes wide shut, and still see my intentions, we don’t speak orally, but we have conversations, it’s a paradox of reality, an explosion of the senses, a parade of emotions, a prison with no fences, a simple moonlit night, with love or lust being the question, our hearts, our weapons, forever, eternally

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I stopped searching so I could find, I tripped and stumbled, bumped into walls in the dark, blind, without you, the sun didn’t shine the same – dimmer than energy preserving bulbs, I wanted to walk the road, together, but together as one for me, meant alone, when I felt lost, I refused to look at a compass or a map, I’d follow the lit constellations, they would lead me directly to you, I was sure of that, my destination? infatuation, current population – one, I’m stuck travelling this universe, in search of you, my soulmate, I can almost taste you, I can almost feel you, the halcyon days end as I grow more desperate, seek me, ravish me, tell me you love me, need me, crave me, I’ll hand you the purest parts of me

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Mindless consumption

And when I looked at you, the stars descended into the pupils of your eyes. It gave me the light I had hopelessly been seeking, in a time where the light at the end of the tunnel was a lie, fabricated.

How I had desired the tranquility, the peace, the influence you seemed to possess, and loathed your ability to only avail it when your authority was questioned. 

I assimilated to your every human sense; your entire being. My body would synergise at the mere sight of you, confirming the enslavement of my heart. You were the drug I was warned about – but was mindless enough to consume anyway