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The rats 🐁

I met an ugly, fat rat once, it was smelly and hairy, it tried to trick me one day, it tried hard to be devious and scary, but I wasn’t afraid, as I’d dealt with rats before, I wouldn’t bow down to it, I got so restless I’d be awake and I’d start to snore, 

The rat wasn’t impressed, it responded by calling me rude names, but the words didnt affect me, because the rat didnt have a brain, there was no creativity in what they were trying to say, I couldn’t understand it the spelling was that poor, I thought that rats were clever animals, maybe this rat hadn’t matured, 

I tried to teach the rat some information, something they were deeply lacking in, it wasn’t appreciated, I think they suffered a deformation, the rat had more than two faces, and knowing they had nothing left, went back to the same people, that they’d been fighting with for ages,

The rat was feeling lonely, they realised they had nothing, I didn’t feel nothing at all, liberation only, I tried to put myself in their head, to see how I would feel, I just couldn’t do it, to be that spineless and brain dead, I knew I’d never heal, the rat got even angrier, knowing I would laugh, trying to get a reaction, but writing is a weapon, one the rat could never have,

So now theres anger in the air, it’s been brewing for a while, the tension is increasing, no longer people smile, rats run in the street, creating chaos and trying to scare, but rats soon get taken out like garbage, no more menacing eyes to stare, throw them in the puddle, drown them in the sewers, put them out of my misery, stick them with barbecue skewers, keep their heads under the water, until they no longer breathe, send them to the slaughter, keep them rats away from me

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Opposites attract

​I’m a writer with no words, a poet with no syllables, I’m a clock with no time, I’m a sleepy morning with open eyes, I’m a lover with no one to call my own, I’m a fighter with no troubles, I’m an addict with no addiction, I’m a singer with no tone, I’m everything and nothing, but opposites attract, I’m a symphony of life, I’m a worker who got sacked, I’m a million and one things, but certainly not a number, I’m a person, hungry with no hunger, I’m a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, an aunt, a cousin, a lover, a beginning to an end, I’m everything I need to be, but not everything I want to be, I’m alive, but just lately, I feel pretend

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You’re the darkness 🌙

​I devour moons to light the darkness within, the shadows left from your heart haunt my memories, I push them into silence, but they screech back with dedication, swaying back and forth to the hum of their own tunes, I drown in desperation, the desire to erase you overwhelms, with fractures in my mind i carry you, I fear I’ll never be healed, never to feel again

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Book extract- coming soon

​I don’t know why I feel the need to impress her. The need to show off what I have, which isn’t much, is overwhelming. It’s not in a horrible way that I have to do it, I don’t do it to be mean, I just simply cannot help myself.  It’s part of my personality. It’s me. How do I change it? I don’t know. I wish I did, it’s getting me down. She is my addiction, my cure, my reasoning, my angel, my devil, my world, and she will never know it. She looks through me, almost like I don’t exist. It hurts, but not as much as it would nurt to never get a chance to be with her. I spend the long days staring at her, daydreaming about a future that will never happen. I plan it meticulously, every detail in small print within my brain. I never believed in love, because everyone who had ever spoken of it, only spoke of the heartbreak – not the good memories,  the emotions they felt or how the other person made them feel. It was off putting. I didn’t want a life of pain and misery from my heart being broken, but I didn’t want to live a loveless life either. I guess it was a pro versus cons situation, and I definitely needed to weigh them up. It would be difficult to get Alice to even find me the slightest bit of attractive or try to find out if it was just guys she liked, or girls too, or even- just me. 

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Melancholy

let me just speak, and tell you how I feel, 

exhausted, feeble and weak, 

I can’t bear to eat another meal,

sad doesn’t describe the emotion,

empty and disheartened? 

no it’s lonely, feeble and broken,

depression stews through my veins,

turning them from blue and purple,

to a disillusioned dark grey,

a monotone voice, with a monotone soul

a monotone life, I fear I’m losing control,

I’m yet to meet death, but I feel the connection,

I hear her breathing, and can smell her direction,

caressing my brain with her words, the words of a thespian, 

save me, release me,

fish me out of this aquarium

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Enchantment 🌠

Pour your energy into my soul, envision us together, slowly growing old, take my hand into yours, and show me your world, let us spiral into a concave, write stories that were previously untold,

Let’s forget our troubles in this world, we shall not behave, we will go out with fists of glory, because there’s nothing else I crave, 

With you I have the serendipity I desire, the passion that I need, the strength to continue pushing, when I don’t feel that I can succeed,

You convinced me of true love – a fairy tale written, a happy ending seemed fabricated, until I let you become part of my story, and found myself lustful and smitten 

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If i

If I could have a rose, for every time I’ve been scorned, I’d have a house full of them, surrounded by thorns, if storms were created for every time I wept, the clouds would eventually dissipate and become out of their depth, mourning becomes the norm, if I had a penny, for every time I thought of you, I’d be as rich a a banker, with houses with sea views, if I had a pill, for every time I hurt, I’d be overdosing on them, and leaving this earth, leaving behind bad reviews, if I had an emotion, for every time I’d hated this planet, I’d be succumbing to bitterness, hatred attracts me like magnets, in my head and heart there’s an implosion, if I had to leave this earth, I’d be gone in an instant, kissing goodbye to my family, and giving way to new birth, for a life that is woven